The truth is, if you have confidence, getting better paying jobs, having more friends, having prettier girlfriends, and almost all the best things in this world are more possible. This is the reason why I want to talk to you about how to get more confidence, especially when you are lacking of it.
Don’t you get tired when you just cannot get things done because you feel you cannot do it, fearful of criticisms and what others will say about you? You decide to remain in the background, allowing opportunities to pass you by. I am not suggesting that you hug the spotlight like an egocentric superstar, but just get enough confidence so your qualities will shine and get you moving ahead of life and live your dreams.
When you have confidence, making a better deal with your boss or prospective employer is more possible than not being able to express yourself or make a decision. Confidence can make you attractive to people that they will gravitate towards you to be their friend, ally, or their associate. In the end, life is happier and more blissful.
Now if you still don’t have that confidence in you or at times, lack it, I will share with you some of the steps of getting more confidence. This way you can act more on your potentials and get ahead in life sooner.
Remember that getting ahead in life is sometimes just feeling confident that you will reach your dreams. So let’s start….
I know you are surprised that I included this on my list. But there is a scientific study that found smiling can trick your brain or your mind into making you happier. There is even a conclusion that its effect is similar to engaging yourself in exercise which gives you more confidence.
When you smile and begin to feel positive and happy, you tend to be more confident, more open, more relaxed, more spontaneous that your mind also stops getting into self-damaging inner monologues. Haven’t you noticed that confident people smile more, flashing their pearly white teeth at any given moment and we cannot think of anything about them but as composed and happy people?
You can start by smiling right now and make that a huge smile from ear to ear. Now, are you feeling confident?
Wear Your Best Clothes
What this means is not literal but, of course, you can also take it that way. What I mean here is to try wearing something that makes you feel better; clothes that can make you comfortable in your skin and make you feel confident.
You certainly have a favorite t-shirt, polo shirt, pair of shoes, tie or whatever it is that wearing it gives you an extra boost, a sense of someone you want to be, someone who has the potential, the energy, or belongingness. While you’re at it, try to feel the confidence that oozes out of you as you wear your best clothes. Try to notice as it gives you a feeling of ‘high’, of someone who is content, composed and, of course, someone who feels confident.
List Things that You Like About Yourself
We tend to hate and focus on our shortcomings, blowing it out of proportion. You try to magnify them to the danger that they are everything that you see in all of you. The reality is you’re not everything that you consider bad about you, you have positive traits and skills no matter how small they are.
For a change, why not list down 10 things that you like about yourself, your skills, your talents, list them all down including your achievements. This will be a handy assistant when you need to build yourself up, when you want to start by inspiring yourself and when you need to appreciate more of what you have.
Get a piece of paper and list them down now.
Done it? Have you noticed that it has broken the pattern of your mind pulling yourself down? Just try to remember to build upon this newfound source of strength, continue to list down the things that you like about yourself and watch how your confidence soar.
Let Go of Comparison
There is no point of comparing yourself to others since each of us are unique and incomparable, different in many ways. Yes, you may be thinking that the people you compare yourself with have all the things in the world, they become successful software developers, sports athletes, chefs, TV hosts, actors or a top executives, but you must remember that you will experience your success in your own way .
Keep in mind that there are things that you are good at while others fall short; at the same time, there are things you fall short of while others are good at. You may probably be good in singing while some can barely carry a tune. Yet, at the same time, others may be better in basketball than you since you’re not a professional athlete.
The best mindset for you to follow then is to do your best in everything that you do. When you want to be a successful online marketer, a copywriter, a singer, a referee, a chef or whatever you want to be to get ahead in life, let go of comparison and just do your best. There’s no point in indulging in it since all of us are different, and can only do the best in our own terms.
Let Go of Other’s Expectation
Let me tell you about an old friend of mine from way back in college. He was the happiest and most confident person I have ever meet back then, always cracking jokes and grinning with smiles, always full of energy and on the go.
One day, I asked him what his secret was and he replied, “I try not to make other people’s expectation of me hold me back. It drains you of energy and enthusiasm”. He told me that people’s insecurities and wrong standards that hold them up have been made by other people. So why think over things like you should have been a manager, a bank president, a CEO or someone who holds an executive position by your age as expected by others. These will only hold you back in achieving your potential.
The bottom line is that what others expect of you is irrelevant as long as you know what you want which is getting ahead of life. Other people’s expectations should not define your worth as they don’t know what you’ve going through or have gone through considering it is only you who knows your capability.
When you are prepared, you are more inclined to be more confident. Preparation can be applied to anything you do in your everyday life. If you are to give a speech, it is well important to practice speaking before an audience. First, try to speak in front of the mirror, see how you look, how you gesticulate, how you make eye contact, and how you can project a confident speaker.
If you’re going to a party, try to look good by wearing your best clothes and prepare yourself to engage in conversation. If you are to give a presentation, it’s also good to prepare your PowerPoint presentation by knowing each part and information in it so you know what to say when somebody asks a question. This gives you more hold of yourself and you feel confident at the same time. Confidence, most of the times, is about being prepared.
I recall a friend who had his first deals he made in the real estate business, where he needed to talk to clients. He was a little unsure of himself, not knowing how things really go. I offered an advice that changed the course on how he deals with his clients: “Just be yourself and say what you have to offer. You’ll be confident before you knew it.” And it was. He became confident.
On the hindsight, this advice may sound to be the simplest of things, but being yourself will give you more confidence than you can imagine. So be yourself, relax and be open to opportunities that may come your way. You will notice the instant light feeling in your chest when you do this and there is the likelihood that you will tend to move and act more freely, more spontaneous, more confident knowing that you have the necessary capabilities to do all things.
Getting More of Life
Remember that you have to build your confidence with consistency that sometimes this is not an over-night process wherein you just become confident instantly. Let the confidence gain momentum and before you know it, you are already there. As you gain more confidence, you will be more attune in receiving more opportunities that can make you have a fuller, happier life. You then can get back on your track of getting ahead in this life. And don’t forget: Live Rich!